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So this elephant walks into a bar…

20 October 2023 by Simon Barnes 3 Comments

 

 

           It was five in the morning. I could tell that from the light in the sky and the sound of feet outside my hut. Before their owner could wake me with a soft-voided “good morning” I got in first: “Morning! Thank you!” I was mildly surprised not hear the usual response: “You are most welcome”.

The footsteps continued, all around my hut, and now they were many. That’s because they were elephants: seven of them, three adult females, two sub-adults and two little ones. Well, they were most welcome. They fed from fallen fruit before drifting away in that uncanny elephantine way. I dressed and went to the river for breakfast.

It was my last morning at Takwela Camp in North Luangwa National Park and at such times everything tends to get a little elegiac. Our guests had a lie-in that morning, no need to get up till six, but I wanted to sit by the Luangwa River drinking rooibos tea. It was important – essential – that I watched the river flow. And counted the birds*.

On these trips we’re always setting off into the bush to seek marvels, sometimes by vehicle and sometimes on foot. But in a way, you don’t have to bother. Plenty of it comes to you.

We flew back south down to Tafika, the main camp. Now I was sitting beside Luangwa 100 miles or so further south, wondering what sort of cake we would be having for tea… and then the buffalo arrived. They were coming down to drink on the opposite side of the river. While they were doing so a bull elephant walked up the bar 50 yards away – no, the barman didn’t ask “is this some kind of joke?” — and then moved away unhurriedly.

I watched the buffalos: more and more and more of them. Like the holes in Blackburn, Lancashire I had to count them all: and there were 700 of them: a great black crowd of massive uncompromising life. By then it was time to go for a drive: I hoped we would see as much on the road as we saw from camp.

*African fish eagle, carmine bee-eater, tropical boubou, purple crested turaco, little egret, cattle egret, greenshank, pied kingfisher, brown-hooded kingfisher, white-crowned lapwing, emerald-spotted wood dove, puffback, long-tailed glossy starling, palm swift, black-collared barbet, cape turtle dove, African pied wagtail, black-headed bulbul, orange-breasted bush-shrike.

  • I was co-leading a trip with Wildlife Worldwide https://www.wildlifeworldwide.com/discover/zambia

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Comments

  1. Otto says

    20 October 2023 at 3:26 pm

    No hawks? Thanks for my regular enjoyable read, bringing back happy memories of 5 years in southern Africa.

    Reply
  2. Andy Lloyd Williams says

    20 October 2023 at 3:53 pm

    Oh my goodness, 20 species of birds to watch – how wonderful! My friend is delighted to hear any elephant stories so this is another one to send. Thank you. Andy LW

    Reply
  3. Jen says

    20 October 2023 at 5:44 pm

    Love these posts Simon – thank you. Really makes me want to be there …

    Reply

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